Financial Domination isn’t for everyone! It’s not a “get rich quick” scheme. For those who master (pun intended) its nuances, it can be quite lucrative as well as a way to have a lot of fun. If I had to provide a definition of findom, it would be the following:
Doms are sent money and lavished with expensive gifts by subs who often want next-to-nothing in return beyond a Dom’s attention – it’s all about submitting to the Dom and giving him control. Much like physical forms of BDSM, it’s this “surrendering of power” that is arousing. But in the majority of cases, the Dom and the sub never meet – it’s all done online.
Clearly, because cash and gifts are at the center of this fetish, it’s not for everyone. Some would be appalled at the idea of sending money to someone they have never or may never meet. However, for those who are into this scene, that’s the beauty of it.
Doms often employ many strategies to lure subs into paying. Subs may be drawn by Doms’ physical attributes. Doms with beautiful faces, amazing bodies, and yummy feet (another huge fetish that is prevalent in this scene) are quick to grow large followings on Twitter as well as amass cash into their accounts. Doms also use their dominance and “gift of words” to lure in submissive cashslaves. These Doms know how to demand cash and actually get it…sometimes making subs feel guilty for not paying. Finally, some Doms are gifted in presenting themselves as spoiled brats who deserve cash…lots of it. Often in this case, subs are lured into providing for the Dom’s lavish lifestyle. They think nothing of sending hundreds to a Dom while they struggle to make ends meet. There have literally been cases of subs going into massive debt, in rare cases close to homeless, while their Doms are living lavishly.
Successful Doms will tell you it takes time to master the nuances of the scene. Findom Bryan (Twitter: @FindomBryan), one of the scene’s successful Doms, once stated:
“Findom is not just about ‘Fuck you, pay me’ and throwing money at a Dom because the Dom says to pay. There is an element of mindfucking and tapping into the deepest darkest desires of Subs to lose control. A Dom can act like therapists to Subs making them feel safe and secure in losing control. And that’s why so many crave to tribute such large amounts to capture the attention of and please a Dom that can understand them and make them feel safe.”
Because Findom is all about financial domination and can be hard to explain to those who haven’t explored it, I tried to describe what a true cash drain feels like to me. Others might find this description useful:
These individuals rule the scene. They are the ones for whom the scene was created. They can be straight, gay, or transgendered, but they all have one thing in common – a dominating attitude that deserves to be respected. When a sub approaches a Dom, it will be important to show respect and quickly share how you will be useful. Findom isn’t about cam shows and paying for sex. Findom is about subs giving Doms what they deserve and NOT EXPECTING ANYTHING IN RETURN.
Subs exists to serve Alphas. In the gay findom scene, subs are usually gay as well. In the straight scene, men are typically subs to women (although it can easily be the other way around). A true sub serves without expecting anything in return. For those male subs looking for guys to perform on cam, there are other websites for that. Findom is all about total servitude without any expectations. That said, if a sub has a good connection with a Dom, the sub might be lucky enough to get some small token or gift in return. However, it’s at the total discretion of the Dom.
Just as there are bi-sexuals, there are also individuals who play both Dom and sub roles. They have become known as switches. Sometimes a switch is someone who has the urge to serve, but occasionally has an equally strong urge to dominate. Other times switches are simply trying to earn cash to pay their Doms. For Doms, a loyal switch can be a HUGE benefit. In these cases, the switch turns all of his earnings over to the Dom.
Because switches are also subs, they often know how to get into the minds and push the buttons of other subs. Power Switch (Twitter: @PowrSwitch), one of the scene’s successful switches, stated:
“The switch can make a sub feel especially lowly because the sub is being subservient to a fellow sub. In fact some subs prefer to serve switches because it helps them find the depths of their true self. And, switches understand the mindset of a sub more than a master can because they themselves know from experience and can be experts at triggering a sub to drop in service. This context helps the switch to be especially manipulative and momentarily powerful.”
Check out this video that gives a great overview of the whole Findom scene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=shjyxG05yo4
Again, Findom isn’t for everyone. It can be addictive! If you have problems with addiction seek help and don’t start this scene! However, for those subs still considering Findom, I offer the following Commandments for your consideration (from a Twitter post I did several years ago):
OVER 18 ONLY: Findom isn’t for minors. If you are under 18, you need to wait before you engage in this scene.