Finding your Findom Soulmate

A devoted sub of El Rey (@ServeElRey) described how seamless drains are at this point. For example, when his Alpha casually posts he’s in the mood for a RT game, the sub knows to immediately message indicating his willingness to participate.

Not every sub in Findom is seeking to be exclusive with one Dom, but for those who are, it can be a very rewarding experience. I had the chance to talk with several subs who have found their FinDom soulmates, and all of them are as happy as can be!

Their stories are fascinating. Several were typical Findom sluts, serving multiple online Doms until they found the ONE. Others knew their “soon to be Doms” personally (one even started out dating his future owner), and eventually they found themselves completely owned. All of these subs are financially committed to their Doms, in some cases giving their Alphas their entire month’s salaries. One went so far as to add his Dom as a beneficiary on his retirement account. For the subs who serve in-person, they have completely given up their freedoms in order to please their Doms. One sub, who lives with his Dom full time, described it this way:

According to one devoted sub, Master Kev (@19Kev02) demands loyalty, respect, and honesty from each of his subs. His subs actually have formed a community of devoted servants all focused on their Alpha.

“I fund his lifestyle…I get to watch a real man live his life. I get to hear all of the moans and sounds while he’s having sex, and then I come and clean the sheets and make the bed. I put gas in his car, pay for his haircuts, and I give him my card when he wants to go out. You name it, and he has access to it.”

But how did these servants get to the point of total devotion to one Dom? Several of the online subs described how they spent a lot of time going from Dom to Dom…paying those who would just take their cash and disappear until they were ready to drain them again. They described a certain emptiness that came from giving up so much cash to Doms who had little to no interest in them. One sub described it this way:

One of the subs of Arabian Dom (@Arabian_Princ_E…creator of the Moroccan treatment) described the creative ways his Dom keeps him on edge mentally and physically by being forced to do a variety of things on a custom wheel such as burn his own chest hair to drinking weird concoctions. The sub explained, “In some strange way these sessions, with a mixture of intoxicating fear and excitement, also create a strong bond!”

“I would get horny, and I would go on a search each night for any Dom who would give me some attention. I would give them my cash because the drains felt so good. But as soon as they were done with me, I felt empty inside. And most of them could care less…they just went on to their next drain. I wanted something more!”

Most of the subs took months to find their exclusive Dom, but in the end, they felt their search was worth it. What was interesting, however, was that each sub seemed to know almost immediately when they found their perfect match. Some described those first encounters with their chosen Alpha as “refreshing” with one sub saying, “His approach was totally different, and he wasn’t in Findom for “just” the money. He actually wanted to own me and subsequently improve my life!”

A sub of Daddy J (@CashDaddyJ) explained that he sends his Dom a list of his personal goals for the day; often his Dom pushes him to excel…doing even more than he originally thought he could accomplish.

This notion of “improving the sub’s life” was actually echoed by several of the subs. One sub was literally in a state of depression until his Dom helped him completely change his outlook on life. He described it this way:

“My Dom changed my life for the better. In June I was so depressed and hurting…I had no confidence in myself. I hated everything about me. He has focused on me and encouraged me so much. I have a new take on life. My positivity has gotten me two huge promotions at work in seven months. I have confidence in myself again. I feel important and that I have a purpose now.”

The live-in sub of King Virgo (@KingVir919404) described how his Dom made him move in, and he’s been domesticating him as a house bitch; as a result, he’s eating better, losing weight, and doing stuff he never thought he’d be able to do as a sub.

The relationships these Doms and subs have are intense and go far beyond findom. These subs described being able to talk about everyday events one moment and quickly transition to complete servitude the next. Of course, the Doms are always in control, but in each of their relationships, the communication between Dom and sub is solid enough that they are able to talk about almost anything. In several of the situations, they are truly a support system for each other. And when you think about it, isn’t that how any “real” relationship should be? One sub explained it this way:

A sub to Alpha Peebs (@alphapeebs) described being his Dom’s total object and ATM…being used to send money whenever his Dom wants or needs something paid.

“He’s my everything in Findom, we don’t just talk serving or send, we talk life, sports, family etc. We laugh and have great banter; he’s even surprised me by getting my address from another sub friend and sending me a birthday gift. It’s not all material either, it’s spiritual as well. We both feel like crap if we’re fighting (yes we do that) and not talking for a few hours, days, etc., but we ALWAYS make up. So I say this to anyone that thinks a good Dom sub can’t happen, just be patient let Findom nature take its course.”

So what advice do these subs offer to others seeking their Findom soulmate?

A sub to the one and only manc master (@No1muslimmaster) described how his Dom communicates with him everyday several times a day. “I’m his first and last conversation of the Findom day, he won’t even go to to sleep until he hears from me…it’s truly amazing and different!”
  1. Take the time to research potential Doms. Consider those you find physically appealing and check their Twitter feeds for evidence they might be a good match in other ways. 
  2. Make your intentions known early in your conversations with potential Doms, and be ready to quickly show them how you can be useful. Of course, your Doms will expect your tributes and gifts, but what else can you provide? Don’t be boring and constantly talk about the same things…stimulating and/or entertaining conversation is something a sub can offer.
  3. Look for early clues that your Dom might be a good fit as your one and only. Does he show any interest in your life? Does he communicate well? Does he help you strive to be a better version of yourself? Do you feel safe with him? Does he have the time to connect with you? Is he about more than the money? Does he truly enjoy the control he has over you? 
  4.  Accept that not everyday will be ideal. Doms have other subs and lives outside this scene. Don’t assume you get to monopolize all of their time. As you and your Dom get to know each other better, you’ll start to develop a rhythm of when are good times to talk, serve, tribute, and provide space. 
  5. Don’t settle. It may take time to find your #1, and you may experiment with many Doms until then. But don’t settle for someone who isn’t a good match. Yes, you might have a few good drains, but you’ll find yourself feeling empty again real soon. The subs I talked to are proof that it is VERY possible to find your exclusive Findom Alpha. He’s out there…I promise you!

For those sub seeking to serve a single Dom, I wish you the best! Like any relationship, it may take time to find your #1, but don’t give up! From what these subs are telling me, it’s worth the wait to find your Findom soulmate! Good luck!

A special thank you to the following subs for contributing to this page: @CodyBoy92 (sub to @19Kev02), (sub to @ServeElRey), @sub_older (sub to @CashDaddyJ), @Niba2Arabiandom (sub to @Arabian_Princ_E), KDSub1 (sub to @No1muslimmaster), @ether_ethan_ty (sub to @KingVir919404), @peebsobject (sub to @alphapeebs), and @cultureshepher1 (sub to a non Twitter Dom)